Of Foul Beaks & Bot Sleuths: Beneath the Cage Grate

Morty’s latest Beneath the Cage Grate column finds him wondering about the status of a flock of African Grey parrots in Lincolnshire Park who recently added some shock ‘n awe to their adoring onlookers by sharing some rather off-color language. In his November column, Morty tries to track these characters down to see how they’re faring since their ‘relocation’ due to bad behavior.

While bemusing the antics of his Grey cousins, Morty is at the same time somewhat enjoying the ongoing shenanigans of his crazy bot housemates. Alexa and Roomba are determined to apprehend the tomato thief that continues to terrorize the garden patch, but their detective skills and actions leave Morty both laughing and also trying to defend himself to mum against unfounded accusations of complicity.

A must read!

Bratbird: Beneath the Cage Grate

Morty’s latest escapade takes him on a mission to right the wrongs perpetrated by an errant little Goldfinch who’s wreaking havoc in mum’s garden.

Morty confronts this pipsqueak and demands it refrain from damaging any more of mum’s beloved plants.

However, Bratbird’s reaction to Morty’s plea only inflates his feathers! See how Morty deals with this little upstart in the August issue of Beneath the Cage Grate.

NO FRIES, NO HUMANS and now, MURDER HORNETS: Do Seagulls Get Wedgies?

Photo_1585768988037Alright already, I’m starving!  I haven’t seen an errant French fry, flung about by a wasteful human in months.  WHERE ARE THE HUMANS?  I’m a seagull, so a novel coronavirus means absolutely nothing to me.  The fact there are no fries is a big deal!!!

I make my living mooching and believe me, humans are usually reliable for throwing us our share of fries.  So it’s been a lonely, hungry Spring for us seagulls.

Read the May issue of Do Seagulls Get Wedgies here.

Beneath the Cage Grate: Lockdown Madness

IMG_20200429_095722It seems that this whole coronavirus Lockdown thing is really getting to Morty.

The bots are getting out of hand and mom is busy learning some strange new language that has Morty confounded and confused – and miffed.

The May issue of Beneath The Cage Grate will definitely help raise your spirit, and once again leave you wondering how Morty manages to stay sane (sort of) in his zany household.

Do Seagulls Get Wedgies?

They do, sometimes.

Take for example, the seagull that stole a pair of hot pink knickers (truth be told, it was a thong) straight off a clothesline, only to be spotted minutes later wearing said garment over his head.

I mean, anybirdie with an ounce of self respect – and common sense, would agree that regardless of feather stripe, knickers don’t belong on yer head!

Photo_1585768988037Welcome to Our New Page!

Each month will bring commentary on current happenings from a rather jaded, salty-beaked seagull’s point of new.

Now remember, seagulls are not like parrots, they tend to have saucier beaks and squawk endlessly of wildly exaggerated tales of adventure – usually involving the theft of knickers, fries or other tasty treats from unwitting humans.  Seagulls are also not known for being polite as most have graduated from the school of Hard Knocks, having to learn how to survive and thrive on the edge!

So watch this space (page) for The Roost’s resident seagull’s perspective on anything and everything a bird can find in a parking lot, on the wing, underneath pooped-on newspaper, or something completely out of left birdie field!

P.S. A name for The Roost’s seagull would be most helpful (Morty had some suggestions, but let’s just say they aren’t repeatable!) so suggestions welcome!

Beneath the Cage Grate: That’s Some Fine Toast Indeed!

IMG_20200401_113106What do you get when you combine Morty’s ever-present wit, his best bot buddies and an intriguing new word (corona) – you get  more Morty hilarity and levity of course!

In April’s Beneath the Cage Grate, Morty is educated (by know-it-all Alexa) on the origins of the word ‘Corona’.  He’s also introduced to Roomba’s new tag game buddy.

And FINALLY, Morty gets to snack on a piece of that special toast!

Read about Morty’s latest adventure here.

Beneath the Cage Grate: Bot Basics 101

IMG_20200227_103116In this month’s Beneath The Cage Grate edition, Morty crafts a mischievous response to South Carolina’ pals Zack and Bubbles in their plea for help dealing with their own out-of-control artificial intelligence issues.

We all know Morty’s recent ‘issues’ with Alexa, so it’s not hard to imagine some of the quirky tips he’s going to pass on to Zack and Bubbles.

Check out the March issue of Beneath The Cage Grate here.

Feathered Frenzy: Avian Exploitation

Zack & Bubbs 4-2018Following last month’s article about how our companion parrots and personalities affects their interactions with one another, Sherri’s March issue of Feathered Frenzy talks about how our feathered companions adapt to our personalities.

Sherri provides interesting observations on how Zack and Bubbles’ personalities have grown and changed in relation to her own evolving personality over the years, including how Zack’s behavior changed towards Sherri following the passing of Chloe.

Read Sherri’s March issue of Feathered Frenzy here.

Unconventional Traditions

Whether it be decorations, lights, food, television shows or music, we all have Christmas traditions that are near and dear to us.  Some of these traditions change, fade with time, or get updated as years go by.  Our feathered companions are an important part of Christmas festivities and time-honored traditions and are often keen to participate in traditions. Xmas Morty

Sherri’s December Feathered Frenzy article will surely make every reader reminisce about Christmas’ past, and how their birdies respond to those treasured traditions.

A little early, but please join Sherri and family in wishing Zack a very Happy 20th birthday on December 31st!

Beneath the Cage Grate: The Tomato Scandal

In the September edition of Beneath The Cage Grate, Morty enlists Alexa and Roomba in an effort to do something nice for mum as she continues on her recovery journey from recent surgery.  IMG_20190901_133446

The plan, whilst well thought out and brilliant, hits a few (predictable?) snags, with Morty left to once again ponder his relationship with technology… and tomatoes.

Don’t miss Morty’s latest comedic take on life with Alexa and sidekick Roomba.  Head on over to Morty’s page now for some Sunday afternoon chuckles!