Morty’s advice: SCREAM!

Morty - Sept edition

In the latest chronicle of Morty’s advice to fans seeking his sage advice, Chiyome and mates (of Twitter’s Flock Is Family) learn that there may be one sure-fire way of getting their ‘Phone Lady’ to put down her annoying (tech) appendage and pay more attention to them!

If this issue seems all too familiar to you too then you need to go to our Beneath The Cage Grate page and read Morty’s full reply to Chiyome and flock.  Get ready to raise your  roof and get the attention you deserve!

Morty is full of hot air – Turbo Jet (Vacuum) Air!

Greetings to all my favorite parrot friends! Alexa is in a mood after she rolled under the couch. She blames me for her clumsiness! Good help is hard to find these days!

Morty's advert

Recently, I received an interesting letter from a parrot owner.

Dear Morty,

I live in a three bedroom home and have ten parrots. I work 12 hour shifts and when I get home I am too tired to clean. It seems like every bird has the habit of throwing their fruit, veggies, seed, and pellets on the floor! When I go into their room at night, it is a filthy mess. I cant even get near their cages! Is there anything on the market that could help me? PLEASE DON’T TELL ME TO GET A VACUUM CLEANER! I have three. I am looking for a piece of industrial equipment. Price is not a problem.

Messy House

Read Morty’s hilarious reply on Beneath the Cage Grate page.

Beneath the Cage Grate: Dear Messy House

Morty is challenged to adequately respond to a letter from a stressed-out parront who’s trying desperately to keep up with the mess caused by their determined food-flinging flock!

Morty's advert

Catch up with Morty in our August issue coming out next weekend, and get ready for more wisecracks and witty retorts from everybirdie’s favorite birdie columnist, Morty!

No Assembly Required?

Morty

Morty solicits Alexa’s help to purchase what he thought would be a lovely playpen he could enjoy on his back deck.  Well, let’s just say that what the UPS man delivered wasn’t what Morty had ordered… or planned.

Read Morty’s latest adventure here – and be prepared for ‘some assembly required’!

No Assembly Required

Morty’s Column

Goodness knows what Morty is up to this time.  Stay tuned for our mid-July issue of The Roost to find out!

Morty