Cat Lady Fingers Anyone! Beneath the Cage Grate

MortyYou know when they say ‘if it’s too good to be true’ it probably is… well it was very true for Morty’s Twitter friends, Beach Beaks recently!

After receiving a disturbing letter from King Olaf, our in-house intrepid investigator was on the case.  What he discovered was very dark.

All birdies need to know what happened to King Olaf and his Beach Beaks flock so you too can be on the look out for sneaky tricks and evil deeds our humans sometimes try to pull on us!

Catch up with Morty in the latest edition of Beneath the Cage Grate to see what happened to poor King Olaf and Beach Beaks birdies – and learn the key signs of when you’re about to be duped by your humans.

Spa Schma, it’s a trap, it’s a trap I say!!!

Signs, Signs, Everywhere a Sign: Beneath the Cage Grate

20200602_084228Poor Morty, coupled with Lockdown madness and masked humans, his bot buddy Alexa has recently ratcheted up her silliness to a whole new level.

Seems Morty is now being told where to go, what to do and how to do it in Sign form…

If this craziness continues, Morty is going to make his own sign for Alexa, and you can bet it will not be parrot – or bot, friendly 🙂

Find out what Morty has been dealing with of late n the June edition of Beneath the Cage Grate.

NO FRIES, NO HUMANS and now, MURDER HORNETS: Do Seagulls Get Wedgies?

Photo_1585768988037Alright already, I’m starving!  I haven’t seen an errant French fry, flung about by a wasteful human in months.  WHERE ARE THE HUMANS?  I’m a seagull, so a novel coronavirus means absolutely nothing to me.  The fact there are no fries is a big deal!!!

I make my living mooching and believe me, humans are usually reliable for throwing us our share of fries.  So it’s been a lonely, hungry Spring for us seagulls.

Read the May issue of Do Seagulls Get Wedgies here.

Do Seagulls Get Wedgies?

They do, sometimes.

Take for example, the seagull that stole a pair of hot pink knickers (truth be told, it was a thong) straight off a clothesline, only to be spotted minutes later wearing said garment over his head.

I mean, anybirdie with an ounce of self respect – and common sense, would agree that regardless of feather stripe, knickers don’t belong on yer head!

Photo_1585768988037Welcome to Our New Page!

Each month will bring commentary on current happenings from a rather jaded, salty-beaked seagull’s point of new.

Now remember, seagulls are not like parrots, they tend to have saucier beaks and squawk endlessly of wildly exaggerated tales of adventure – usually involving the theft of knickers, fries or other tasty treats from unwitting humans.  Seagulls are also not known for being polite as most have graduated from the school of Hard Knocks, having to learn how to survive and thrive on the edge!

So watch this space (page) for The Roost’s resident seagull’s perspective on anything and everything a bird can find in a parking lot, on the wing, underneath pooped-on newspaper, or something completely out of left birdie field!

P.S. A name for The Roost’s seagull would be most helpful (Morty had some suggestions, but let’s just say they aren’t repeatable!) so suggestions welcome!

Beneath the Cage Grate: That’s Some Fine Toast Indeed!

IMG_20200401_113106What do you get when you combine Morty’s ever-present wit, his best bot buddies and an intriguing new word (corona) – you get  more Morty hilarity and levity of course!

In April’s Beneath the Cage Grate, Morty is educated (by know-it-all Alexa) on the origins of the word ‘Corona’.  He’s also introduced to Roomba’s new tag game buddy.

And FINALLY, Morty gets to snack on a piece of that special toast!

Read about Morty’s latest adventure here.

Beneath the Cage Grate: Never Trick or Treat with Bots!

IMG_20190918_132308In the October (Halloween) edition of  Beneath the Cage Grate, we find Morty, Alexa and Roomba donning costumes and setting out on their Trick or Treat adventure in their apartment building.

Now, you’d think these three would be welcomed at each door with a chuckle and a shower of candy, right?  Alas, as you’d expect, things go a bit sideways, and we find all three little ghouls scooting home in haste, quick to escape some rather weird and spooky encounters.

Be prepared to be scared – silly – in Morty’s Halloween column!  BOO

Beneath the Cage Grate: The Tomato Scandal

In the September edition of Beneath The Cage Grate, Morty enlists Alexa and Roomba in an effort to do something nice for mum as she continues on her recovery journey from recent surgery.  IMG_20190901_133446

The plan, whilst well thought out and brilliant, hits a few (predictable?) snags, with Morty left to once again ponder his relationship with technology… and tomatoes.

Don’t miss Morty’s latest comedic take on life with Alexa and sidekick Roomba.  Head on over to Morty’s page now for some Sunday afternoon chuckles!

YES MORTY, PULL THAT WEED! Beneath the Cage Grate

IMG_20190701_121656It’s a wonderful day in the neighborhood and Morty is in hot water yet again.

After refusing mom’s prompting to learn to sing ‘Happy Birthday’ – and his impromptu, naughty back turn on mom – Morty enlists  the mischievous Alexa to help him mend fences with mom by weeding her garden.

What could possibly go wrong: A LOT!

Head over to the July issue of Beneath The Cage Grate and read about the trouble and chaos this dynamic duo cause in mom’s garden and in the shared greenhouses nearby.  You’ll look at flowers in a whole new way after reading Morty’s latest garden misadventure!